If you're up to date you know that our therapist wanted each of us to find a sexy game online that we could play to increase our intimate times together without having sex. I already wrote about the game I picked, Fun in Bed, so now I'm going to tell you about my husband's pick: A Hot Affair...with your partner. This game had some similarities to the first - cards with different directives, but it was quite different overall. It's a board game that uses cards. There are three different levels - Intimate, Passionate, and Steamy - and you go through each level twice before progressing to the next one. I do not want to do all the typing I did last time so I'm going to put a photo of the directions and hopefully you'll be able to read them.
(Right here you should see a series of photos, but alas, they were too blurry and small for even the most committed of blog readers to make the effort to read; however I will attempt to show you a picture of the board:)
So, there are two players (obviously) and you have a "Go" spot that you start on. The way you decide who goes first is by looking longingly into each other eyes and the last one to blink rolls the dice first. Very cute.
There are different squares on the board that represent actions that you must take when you land on them:
-A heart with a 'T' in it means that you must have a treat
-A plain heart is kind of a wild card and you basically do whatever you want (we did things like tickle, my husband decided to inspect my yellow toenails (and by yellow I mean they were painted yellow), anything you want)
-A martini glass means you take a drink
-A high heel means that you strip off a piece of clothing (we found that we landed on this one more times than items of clothing that we had, so we decided to just keep reversing it; for example, my husband landed on that square when he was naked, so he put his underwear back on - we thought it was a funny twist)
-A heart with devil horns means that you must draw a card and you draw according to what level you are currently on (Intimate, Passionate, Steamy).
Examples of different cards:
Intimate: Hers - "What was the proudest moment in your life? Ask your partner the same question and relive those special times." His - "What does she think of men with tattoos? You may already have some, in which case discuss where the most interesting place for your next one might be. Ouch! You cannot be serious!"
Passionate: Hers - "Pant, Pant. Lick him through his underpants and see what stirs beneath!" His - "Is that your pump, or are you just pleased to see me? Recreate those magical days of love behind the garage. Have a three-minute fumble with deep making out and wandering hands....but no actual sex! Oh, the agony and the ecstasy!"
Steamy: Hers - "Turn yourself into an irresistible ice cream cone and invite him to eat you! Lying down, put the ice cream on your nipples, between your breasts and in your navel." His - "Give Me A Ring. If your partner possesses some 'scrunchies' (things they use for bunching up hair), invite her to put one round the base of your erection so it's tight but comfortable. Leave it there at least for your next two throws of the dice.
Every time you pass go, you pick a Fantasy Card. You read it to yourself and it stands by. You'll pass Go 5-6 times depending on whether you're the winner or not, and every time you get up to 3 Fantasy Cards, you have to let one go. At the end of the game, the winner gets to choose between his/her 2 remaining Fantasy Cards and the couple plays out that fantasy. Now, we are not having sex yet, nor are we emotionally ready for lots of sex-type things, so a lot of these fantasy cards were moot for us at this time, but may be on the table in the future. My husband won and he chose the following Fantasy:
"There was once a beautiful young girl who took a job as a chambermaid at a nearby hotel. She was poor and so low was the pay she was tempted into stealing from hotel rooms. One day, she was caught taking money from a bedside drawer by a customer who had returned unexpectedly to his room during breakfast. He was a handsome man with a kindly face, so the maid begged him not to report her, for she was certain to lose her job. Lifting her skirt to reveal irresistible high-cut black panties, stockings and garter belt, she said she would do anything, anything, to stop the matter going any further. And so the handsome gentleman took her at her word, and laid the matter to rest."
So we did act that out in our own non-intercourse kind of way. It was fun (and funny).
Just to give you an idea of the ultra-kinkiness of this game, I will now quote another Fantasy Card that we did not act out, just for fun:
"Sucking Up To The Boss: Here you can either be the boss, or the staff member (!!) The boss is giving an employee a performance appraisal...using some pretty unorthodox techniques. First, oral communication: the boss walks around to the front of the desk, reveals the managerial genitalia and demands oral satisfaction from the confused employee. Now the boss wants the employee to know what it feels like to be the boss - so places are exchanged and the oral performance is reversed. Next the boss wants to see how the employee performs when their back is against the wall - a real test of character. Standing naked against the wall, the employee must have full intercourse with the boss. Afterwards, the conversation turns to large raises and exciting openings. The appraisal has been a good one."
So that's my basic explanation of this game. A lot of it is too advanced sexually for us at this time, but has a lot of potential for fun in the future. However, I think that we could just play the first two levels and leave out the third level (steamy) for now, as well as pick and choose our Fantasy ending. Also, to truly play this game the way it's intended, you need all kinds of props - drinks, food, sometimes chocolate that you melt to rub over someone's body, ice to rub on the genitalia (?!),etc. We kind of brushed over some of the more time consuming things like that because we weren't really prepared for all that and the game still took about an hour and a half. So you can really make the game whatever you want to make it. Overall, it's a fun game, and the whole point is to spend intimate, sexy time together - mission accomplished. We had a good time, we laughed, and we did lots of sexy things with each other.