Monday, February 22, 2010

Some Positives

Okay so mostly I just want to complain and be sad and frustrated about all this, but there are some good things going on so in this post I will focus on those.

Last week my physical therapist told me that I can alternate the days that I do dilator exercises and stretching exercises. This may not seem like a big deal, but it is. That means that I have one less thing that I have to do every day! I am very excited about this and even in the last week I feel more relaxed than I have felt just knowing that when I get home each night I have one less thing on my plate.

My previous post was complaining about exercising. My feelings about exercising haven't changed much, but I do have a little positive exercising news. My wonderful husband, whose perpetual optimism is my lifeline through all this, continues to try and think of ways to make my life easier while I continue to work through all these problems. He has offered to exercise with me (even though he's in great shape and whatever we do really wouldn't be a "workout" for him) and he has tried to make suggestions of things that I can do. So this past weekend we went outside and played tennis! The weather was perfect (about 55 degrees) and I really had a lot of fun. We had so much fun that we actually played on Saturday and Sunday. It was great to get outside on a sunny day and run around a bit. Now that doesn't mean that my work week exercise problem is solved (not at all), but I do feel good that I got off my ass this weekend and exercised.

My husband really wants me to be able to celebrate every step of this process. I have a hard time with this because I just want to be fixed and moving up a dilator size just doesn't seem that exciting to me. But I know he's right so I am trying to focus on the positive and really celebrate each moment.

So here I am: today I am celebrating the fact that my daily routine has been shortened and that I exercised this weekend! It's a start. And I am in a pretty good mood today. I'm sure you know that when you have this problem every day is touch and go. I never know when a bad mood will hit me, or when I'll just feel completely down and defeated. But I also never know when I'll wake up and feel encouraged and positive. Today is a positive day and I'm thankful for it. I'm sending you all virtual positive feelings as well and I hope that you too have some positive days.


Anonymous said...

That's great! And your husband sounds like an amazing person. It gives me hope that I might actually find someone who will be understanding and still want to be with me once he found out that i am a mess down there!

the girl with pain "down there" said...

Yes he is amazing. He's completely supportive and I know there are other guys like him out there. He married me in the thick of this problem and we weren't able to have sex on our honeymoon at all. So he is proof that there really is more to a relationship than sex. We have a very close and strong relationship and even though we're working through some emotional problems related to my vaginal pain, we are first and foremost there for each other. I feel very lucky.

Anonymous said...

Speaking of exercise, do you find that things like running or walking a lot aggravate your vulvar pain? I haven't been able to go back to running in a while because the movement's unbearable.

the girl with pain "down there" said...

Running and walking does not aggravate my pain. Sitting for long periods of time and not drinking enough water definitely aggravate my pain. And I find that doing yoga, or just stretching the pelvic area really helps to relieve pain, as do hot baths.